Making New Year’s resolutions is a tradition in which many of us partake but very few follow through. The reason for that annual abandonment of our would-be positive pursuits? We’re setting lofty, hard-to-obtain goals without any real plan of action. This year, think long and hard about your resolutions and how to reasonably achieve them – then chart out your plan of attack. Here are few ideas on what to concentrate on for resolution success in 2015, and a few commonly made goals that aren’t worth your time or energy.

Make These 5 Resolutions

Save X Dollars by X Date

Instead of this year saying that you’re going to “save more money,” choose an actual dollar amount and make a list of real ways you can reach it. Perhaps you can cut a few non-essential expenses from your budget, have a portion of your paycheck direct deposited to your savings account, or take on a few side gigs or a part-time job if you have the extra time. It’ll also help to assign that savings goal to a specific intention, like paying off debt, making an investment, or going on vacation. By having a well-mapped outline of how you intend to stick to this resolution (with obtainable deadlines to meet), you’re much likelier to stay on track than if you broadly decide to simply “increase your savings.”

Read X Books You’ve Never Read

Because I’m at my computer or on my phone all day, I get all of my news and other content online – and I’m sure plenty of you do, too. But while quick clips and snippets of current events are convenient, the Internet doesn’t compare to having a real book in your hands. Last year, instead of saying that I wanted to “read more books,” I set a goal of reading three new books from January to December. That may seem like a low number, but that’s what I decided I could reasonably handle (especially considering that I read zero books the year before). Because I had an actual figure in my head (with start dates for each book), I completed that resolution successfully. If you need more reasons to adopt this resolution and keep it, consider the fact that reading books has several scientifically proven health benefits, like stress reduction, memory improvement, and improved focus and concentration. You won’t hear anybody say that about spending the majority of your time surfing the web.

Set a Fitness Goal – Like Training for a 10K

Like the two resolutions above, generalizing your fitness-inspired declaration as “exercise more” is setting you up for failure. When will you start exercising more? Do you have a workout partner? Why do you want to work on your fitness? Do you even have a gym membership? You can work all these questions out on your own, but the most important part of your resolution to get fit is to have a purpose and a plan for it. For instance, let’s say you want to participate in a 10K this year. If the race isn’t until May, you have five months to get your body ready for the 6.2-mile run.
To prepare, schedule the dates and times you plan to run (and treat it like any other appointment!) with a mini-goal of how many miles to reach each week. If you’re not in the greatest shape, start with one mile three times a week for a couple weeks, and gradually push yourself farther week after week until you’ve conditioned yourself to run a 10K. You can do it.
I was a longtime smoker who only quit earlier this year. When I kicked the habit, I set a personal goal to run a 10K – and I’ve run several of them since the end of last summer. Now I’ve got my eye on a half-marathon this spring or summer, a feat that wasn’t in my realm of possibility a year ago and in which I had no interest, to be honest. What a difference a bit of motivation and commitment make.

Pick a Bad Habit to Concentrate on Curbing

Is there something you do that you don’t like about yourself? Perhaps it’s biting your fingernails, only brushing your teeth once a day, or maybe it’s drinking a bit too much. Personally, I’m guilty of the latter, so I know how difficult it is to keep this resolution intact for a week, let alone an entire year. No matter the difficulty, however, if you want to change something about yourself, you first have to be conscious of it and then make a concerted effort to curb it.

For my part, I plan to add more evening gym time to my schedule to reduce the opportunity to hit the bar (I live in NYC, so they’re very easily accessed) or participate in something productive opposed to destructive. That could be baking at home for my neighbors or seeing a movie – whatever it takes to not imbibe.
They say it only takes about three weeks to form a new habit, so if you can make your new habit not doing the old one for the first 21 days of January, you’re off to a great start.

Support Our Advertisers

Repair a Relationship That’s Broken

We’ve all hurt somebody’s feelings to the point that the relationship has been severely damaged (OK, maybe not all of us; I’m sure there are a few people left in the world who aren’t assholes), and most of us have been hurt badly enough that we’ve decided to steer clear of someone. It’s all part of real life. But if you want to repair a broken relationship, it’s possible – considering the other person feels the same way.
The first step is to consider the circumstances. Were you the offender or the offended? If you were the former, it’s your responsibility to reach out with your genuine apology, only after you’ve accepted what you’ve done and are committed to keeping your apology free of “but”s. And what I mean by that is that it’s not a valid apology if you haven’t fully accepted the blame.
On the flip side, if you’ve been offended and you want someone to say they’re sorry to you, it’s OK to make it known that you’ve been hurt, but don’t expect the outcome for which you’re hoping. The other person’s apology is not up to you, and there’s nothing you can do about it. If they want to be part of your life, they will. If they don’t, good riddance.

Omit These 5 Resolutions

Pursue a Daily Act of Random Kindness

This is an admirable goal, I admit, but it’s nowhere near remotely pragmatic. There are so many reasons why you can’t keep this up for a year – 365 of them, to be exact – that you’ve lost the battle to be a good Samaritan before it’s even begun. You’ll get sick this year, you’ll be hungover this year, and you’ll have a very bad day this year – and all you’ll want to do is tell people to shove it. Don’t force yourself to do something nice when you don’t want to, and definitely not on a daily basis.
Instead, engage in a more realistic charitable pursuit, like deciding to donate your old coats to a homeless shelter, volunteering to serve a holiday meal to the needy, or adopting a pet if you’re ready to be a responsible parent. One good deed may beget another good deed down the line, but you don’t have to press it.

Stay Away From Social Media

If you have the resolve to completely abandon social media, I’ll pat you on the back… then call you a liar behind it. The truth is – whether we like it or not – we live in a society that now thrives on social media. This method of communication isn’t going away anytime soon, and any attempts to avoid it altogether are futile. Alas, if you feel like you need a break from social media, take it. Maybe it’s a week; maybe it’s a month. Set whatever goal you think you can handle, remove the temptation to participate from your phone and other devices, and enjoy a yesteryear respite for a spell. You’ll come back eventually, and that’s fine, but you don’t need to beat yourself up about breaking a promise that’s nearly impossible to keep.

Quit Smoking and/or Drinking

The struggle is real with these two common resolutions that are made with good intentions but all too often end in disappointment and self-loathing. When you cut yourself off from something you love cold turkey, the psychological (and often times physical) craving for it increases inexplicably. Thus, don’t decide that you’re going to quit drinking or smoking as a blanket goal. Instead, take the initial steps to curb the habit like I mentioned in the first half of this piece. Add more productive activities to your schedule at prime bar times so you’re otherwise engaged, and pick up smoking cessation items from the store or ask your doctor for medication that can help.
Commit to smoking and drinking less (with help if you need it; no shame in that) and the ability to quit altogether (if that’s what you want) will come much easier.

Eat Healthier

A resolution to consume more nutritious food doesn’t begin with eating – it begins with shopping. If you buy healthier food and only healthier food, it’ll be the only food you have in the house; you have no choice but to eat healthy under that regimen. On the contrary, if you have even one delicious, fatty snack in your house with a goal to eat healthier, you’ll be stuffing your face the first few days of January. Ah, human nature. Additionally, you can create a list of healthy recipes to make during the week – I plan two weeks of recipes on a calendar a few days in advance – and build your shopping list with only the ingredients you need for those dishes. After a few weeks, you’ll find that it’s not very difficult to eat healthy when you’ve planned for it.

Stop Obsessing About…

You know what happens when you make a resolution to stop obsessing about something? You think about it even more because you’ve made a big deal about resolving not to do it. This is the definition of counterproductive, and it must be stopped. Whether it’s an ex-boyfriend who dumped you, something mean you said to someone that you now regret, or an upcoming event that’s causing you anxiety, you need to find a solution to the problem instead of trying to put it out of your mind. However you reach a solution will depend on you, but you need to get over whatever it is and move on with your life. You take the good, you take the bad, you take ’em both and there you have… yep, these are the facts of life, folks; accept, resolve, start a New Year.